She's gone and done it.

I know you'll be reading this, so I'm going to write to you, okay?

You broke up with me last night--again. You just aren't sure that I'M the one. And it isn't fair to stay with someone if you don't feel the same way. I feel that we are meant to be forever. You don't know if that is so. I want you to be as happy as possible. If that means we can't be together, so be it. Yes, you are my best friend. And I am yours. Nothing has to change when it comes to how much we love each other, and I'm willing to fight to see that it doesn't. A lot of times it is extremely hard to maintain a friendship after a break up. But this isn't the same as last time, and it's clear that we need each need the other in our lives. You told me you will NEVER cut me out like you did again. You said yourself you would break down without me, and I know the same goes for me.

I'm not breaking down right now. Because we are still us. At this point in my life, I can not see living without you. I hate that this had to happen over facebook. And to be made official we blog about it. But you know what? That doesn't really matter. What matters are the facts and what happens. And the fact is that you love me and I love you. You are a senior in high school and shouldn't have to KNOW who you are going to be with for the rest of your life. The fact that you want to see what else is out there makes sense to me. Just because I am "certain" we should be together forever doesn't mean you will be. I pray. For your happiness. For my happiness. For us both to grow as people and become the very best people we can be. I'm not praying that we will get back together and everything will be okay, . Because everything will be okay, whether we do or if we don't, even if I can't believe that in this moment, I know it to be true.

Nothing is ever certain. Ever. I can say that you will be in my life forever, no matter if it is as my future wife or as my life-long best friend. But we don't KNOW. All we can do is live for the now. And in the now, I love you with every fiber of my fucking being.  Who knows if that may some day change? But "maybes" and "tomorrows" lead to heartaches and sorrow. I love and am in love. You love and aren't sure. I can handle that. This is me letting you know that I'm going to be okay. I'll be better than okay, I will grow.


Yours,
Sir